Peregrine and I were walking home when we saw a motorcycle almost collide with a guy on a bicycle cart/rickshaw. No one was hurt, though the motorcycle guy had to hit the brakes hard to avoid a collision. He mouthed off to the bicycle guy (who was obviously poorer than him and much smaller than him), the bicycle rickshaw guy mouthed off right back to him, and it looked like it might get ugly.
As the argument intensified, several local men told the two of them to just walk away, just move on. I did the same. But they seemed like hotheads, and each time one was about to end it, the other had to get in one more word that started it up again.
Finally, the motorcycle guy had enough. He picked up the (significantly smaller) bicycle guy and slammed him against the ground. The big guy than began walloping the little guy with punches from above.
In one of my quickest and funniest-looking nonviolent interventions ever, I dove between them and caught myself in a pushup stance above the smaller guy, making my body an impromptu human shield. The motorcycle guy backed off and the bicycle guy slid out from underneath me.
Then the bicycle guy picked up a huge length of wood and tried to crack the other guy’s skull, but with me still in the way! This time I did a basketball defender stance, arms and legs spread wide as I shuffled to stay between them. For a second I thought he was a little too angry and I was the one who would get my skull cracked.
Luckily, the absurdity of the situation must have been driven home, and after a little more convincing from me and the crowd they both went their separate ways. I was laughing as Peregine and I finished our walk home. Wasn’t that something!